literally, Ely Buendia almost died while doing what he loves best---playing his music. Ely had a heart attack while performing at a gig. fortunately, God was still merciful and gave Ely a second chance. if he had lost his life right at the moment he collapsed, everything would not have been the same again. he is a true legend who had changed the Filipinos' perception of Pinoy Rock. the whole music indusrty will have wept for such a terrible loss. it would have also been devastating to his family, much more to his wife, Diane. he could've died at a young age of 36. But thank God, Ely is still alive.

i listened to Magic 89.9's live broadcast of the LIVELY, a fund-raising concert that Ely's friends organized, last night and i was so overwhelmed by how many musicians have insisted to perform for free. donations were placed in boxes and t-shirts were sold for 200 pesos each. the proceeds will be used to pay for Ely's hospital bills and continuous medication, that would probably last for months. in a letter, Ely thanked all his fans, those people who continued to believe in him, his friends and all the bands and artists who participated in the benefit gig. he said he would like it better if he was the one performing on stage rather than being the reason why the concert was organized.

so, you see, death is inevitable. it picks anyone at any place, at any time. i may get hit by a bus later, or get stabbed by a holdapper on my way to the dormitory, i never know. the truth is, i'm scared of dying. friggin scared of it. it gives me the chills just thinking of not being able to spend Christmas with my family anymore or hang out with my friends or watch DvDs for a whole day with my brothers or kiss my mom and dad every time i want to or go shoppong with my lola. if i die, my body is of no use anymore. and even if my spirit lives on, my dreams would all just be dreams. unfulfilled. every night, before i go to sleep, i say a prayer and beg to God, saying, "PLEASE DON'T LET ME DIE TOMORROW." and then i add that if i do, i want Him to make sure that my love ones are okay. as i get older, i realize how important time is, how valuable every minute is. that is why i say I LOVE YOU to my parents and my grandma every time i get the chance to text them. yup, medyo corny pero i got used to it. tsaka i don't want to die without ever saying how much i love them. i know they know i do pero siyempre, iba pa rin if i'd say it to them.

tsaka i've learned how to manage my time na. i bought a daily planner. tapos i made this long list of the things i want to do before i turn 20 years old. so far, i've done 17 out of 50. not bad if you ask me. lahat ng 17 na yun, nagawa ko dito sa manila. i've wanted to do them before pa pero i am not as determined as i am now. sabi nga, if there's a will, there's a way. all this time management is fun naman pala. i get to do a whole lot of stuff and before i know it, i would have spent the most fulfilling life one has ever experienced.

so when i die, i would look back on all the days that i've spent on earth wearing a huge smile on my face, saying, "Ahhh.. SULIT!"